WHAT IS CHOICE?

After naming my blog as “importanceofchoices” I am now asking myself what is Choice? It might sound stupid and funny but those who understood where I am going will know I am talking sense (sometimes its good to talk non sense also J). Choice literally means option, selection, alternative, pick and frankly saying coz of literal meaning I named my blog as “importanceofchoices” (its true that I was inspired by Richard Bach’s ‘One’ but I don’t want to give him full credit for my thoughts). I realize that I should look for deeper meaning of Choice. What is it exactly? Is it the most important ingredient in life’s recipe (I can think of comparing my thoughts with recipe coz unfortunately I am cooking everyday and I really pity people who have to eat food cooked by me ;-)) Is choice ONLY going to decide my destiny? And more important question is does destiny exist? (I am asking this question in this post coz I strongly feel that it will help me to understand choice better)So let me try to see if I can answer my question about Destiny and whether I can correlate them (at least I can try).

To be honest I don’t believe in Destiny, luck, fate, whatever you call it. I find it just an excuse made by people who does not achieve their dreams. No one’s fate is pre decided. Everyone has to search their own path. I can see glass half filled or half empty choice is up to me. What I choose to see or go is completely up to me (See I told you if we talk about Destiny we will end up at CHOICE but I never thought it will be so soon) I know for sure that I am going to design my destiny. I and only I will know where I will be after couple of years. There is nothing called luck, kismet. What really exist are WORK, ABILITY and YES CHOICE. By choosing certain path I will reach some destination and how that destination will look is decided by what I do along the path. Lets say I started walking on my chosen path (of beautiful life with my beloved) with my beloved one (signifies non materialistic thing). Along the path I become greedy and I kill my beloved one so I can get all its belongings (signifies materialistic thing). When I reach my destination I realize it’s not the way I thought it will be there is something missing. What I don’t realize is I have changed my chosen path by my own deed. It would be unfair to say that only choice will decide what future will be like. In reality it is the combination of CHOICE and ACT which plays the trick. What PATH I choose and what I DO on my chosen path are very important to achieve my dreams.

I reached the end of tunnel and my light is coming from the thought that THERE IS NO DESTINY AND MOST IMPORTANT INGRIDENT OF LIFE ARE CHOICES AND ACT

Good Job Purnashilpa!!! (It is always advisable to praise yourself once. Let me tell you one secret come near actually no one praises me and to fill that space in my life I have to praise myself.)

Why Do We Regret Our Choice?

Lot of times it happens in our lives that we make decision based on circumstances. Our choices are governed by others (at least its true to larger extent for Indians). We are bound to choose something coz we have been brought up in the environment where what is right or wrong is decided by society and what they accept or follow becomes right. You are not free to try on something or choose something which society doesn’t approve unless you are from Upper middle class family or from high society. Rules differ from society to society and so choices. I can choose to be single or plan to marry when I am late 30’s if I am not in lower middle class family. And if I happen to be from lower middle class and choose/decide to marry @ late 30’s then will society allow me to? Will they let me live peacefully without bad mouthing or pointing finger on my character? Will the so called sophisticated Indian men stop themselves from not taking advantage of a single female in late 30’s? It’s true for higher society also but then it gets hidden beside your status and money (trust me power of money is infinite, can shut any mouth)

I am not complaining about anything. All that I am saying is our choices get limited or horizons are not wide. What I guess we do is to choose whatever best is available in choice departments for that time and circumstances. Everyone regrets some decision of past. We can’t deny that. People who say that I have no regrets are lying in my eyes. How can u not regret any of your decisions? And if you are not then you telling people that whatever you choose proved out to be best for you. And my thinking tells me we can’t hit bullseye every time we make choices in our lives. We are humans who are prone to mistakes more than anything else in life. Yes we will not regret our choices only if we accept the effect of our choices or get adjusted with new life or try to make best out of worst. Yes!!!! That’s the only time when we (at least I) won’t regret my choice. But (there is always but in the route guys) it’s not easy not to think about your wrong choice which has landed you in the mess (or lighter version of mess depending upon what you choose). Might be you are able to forget your choice but I am not. I made lot of choices in my life and lot of times I regret making those. I am just being honest. And funny thing is (or I should say scary) I keep making choices which I tend to regret. Some months back also I made a choice (though it was not what I wanted to choose but I gave up in front of societies rule or let me be honest again I didn’t have guts and power and support to fight with society) and I am regretting it and worst is I can’t go back and correct it or choose a different option. I guess I got the answer. You regret your choice when you are force to choose something (this is the time your heart tells you to choose right one but your mind asks you to choose wrong option). Since you have limited options open you tend to choose which you think is best and SAFE. Yes we are fearful people. We always want to play safe. The choices which look safe generally put us into lot of trouble and mess.

Conclusion is Choose what you think is right for you. Don’t always play safe sometimes it’s best to take risks (I must admit here that I don’t have guts to take risks), what is socially right might not be right in your case.

The best thing to do is CHOOSE FROM WHATEVER IS AVAILABLE FOR YOU BUT IF YOU ARE NOT SATISFIED THEN GATHER SOME GUTS AND STRENGTH AND GET YOURSELF IN THE BATTLEFIELD AND MOST IMPORTANT LOOK FORWARD TO WIN. DON’T FORCE YOURSELF TO CHOOSE SOMETHING IT WON’T MAKE YOU HAPPY